Friends, I want you all to know: I haven’t just been neglecting the blog. I’ve also been going on political rants on podcasts, pitching my work to various publications (some of which actually publish my stuff. Thank god for drunk editors), and crafting post-apocalyptic tweets in the style of some of my favorite playwright/composers. As one does.
Those of you familiar with the blog know that I have no shortage of celebrity crushes. They mostly center around Jeff Goldblum, with the occasional exception made for Bruce Springsteen in an ungodly amount of denim. In recent years, I’ve added Lin-Manuel Miranda to my list of celebrities who I would be cool with kissing, if, say, like aliens happened to kidnap us both and were like, “WHAT THIS IS KISSING YOU SPEAK OF?” and we absolutely had to demonstrate for them in order to save the human race.
Rand keeps telling me